feminism and anti-feminists

[aftertherockets]

Yesterday I posted a remark about how I didn't understand women who label themselves as "anti-feminist," and it sparked a bit of debate that I didn't quite expect.

For me, feminism means wanting both sexes to enjoy the same rights. It means that a woman should be able to go to college, have good jobs and make good money, hold political offices, write books, direct movies, or own a business the same as any man. Feminism is about equal rights.

Feminism is not, however, about not shaving/showering/using deodorant/etc. Those are matters of hygiene. Feminism is not about hating men or considering women to be superior to men. The point was brought up that those women who label themselves as "anti-feminist" are trying to disassociate themselves with certain aspects of feminism that they don't agree with. I don't think criticisms of feminism are wrong, in fact they should be encouraged, because no one should blindly follow any sort of ideology without question. What I have a problem with is any woman in 2004 enjoying the right to work, go to college, drive a car, not get married or have children if they don't want to, or hell, even vote, who then claims herself to be an "anti-feminist."

Some women do not consider themselves feminists merely because of the stigma attatched to the word, and that is something I think we should work to correct. The term "femi-Nazi" is something I find highly offensive, which I suppose makes it a very effective phrase. Feminists, even the really extreme version which I suppose the term is supposed to refer to, have never tried to eliminate a race of human beings. Nazis are a group that most people have agreed to hate. To associate them with feminists implies two things: first, that any woman who thinks herself equal to a man is to be hated and ostracized; and second, that the people who use this term are afraid of feminists and the patriarchal balance that they are trying to upset.

Mostly, I believe feminism to be about choice. If I want to marry, I can. If I don't want to, I don't have to. If I want to have a career, I can. If I want to stay at home with my 2.5 children and cook all day, I can. Maybe chivalry went out the window with the freedom to choose my own path, but that's something I can live with. Personally, I don't want to be indebted to anyone, man or woman, if I can help it. I can take care of myself, and I don't need, or want, anyone to ride in on a white horse and rescue me. I am not opposed to someone helping me, emotionally, physically, financially or otherwise, but I would never want to sit back and let someone else be responsible for me.

I'm interested in your opinions on the topic. Healthy debate makes me happy!

Comments

[egosomnio.livejournal.com]

I'm a feminist in the dictionary definition of the word...however, there are women who take things too far (there are men who do the same thing on other issues, but those issues aren't the topic of the moment, so we'll ignore them).
The term "Nazi" does not necessarily mean killing off an entire race of people. "White supremecy" groups are a type of neo-Nazi organization, for example, and don't all want to kill off all non-caucasian people. There are women who could be classified as "man-haters." They are a minority, but a vocal one. These women I refer to as "femi-Nazis." This does not equate all feminists with the Nazis, just as "white supremecist" does not equate all whites with racism. Nor does "neo-Nazi" equate Nazis with any modern group that has the "neo" prefix.

The women who consider themselves to be "anti-feminist" are, to my understanding (this is about women, so my understanding is admittedly limited), often equating feminism with a step away from, for lack of a better word, chivalry. Or, as the stand-up comic Gallagher put it, "if you stand up for your rights, someone's going to take your seat." Some people (male and female) think that feminism means that, for example, a man shouldn't hold a door open for a woman. There are some women who refuse to walk through a door being held open for them (if memory serves, it was a while before I convinced Chris that is was alright if I held the door for her). A lot of people equate that sort of attitude, which is still a far cry from the "femi-Nazi," with feminism. There are a lot of women who enjoy those little extra courtesies, so they think if they seek equal treatment as men, they will lose them.


Or I could be full of shit and barely awake...wait, I definately am...but there's an off chance that something up there makes sense, right?
...okay, I just checked. I did type it in more-or-less standard English, so I'm sure something makes sense. Even if it's just my punctuation.

[(Anonymous)]

im glad there is a step away from chivalry. chivalry needs to be de-sexed to become a common courtesy to hold doors for all fellow humans, man, woman or either. its dumb to want to be treated dainty because you are a woman =)

[evergleam83.livejournal.com]

Yes, your post makes sense. I am far too tired to deliver a coherent reply, but I will. Hopefully. Or I'll just IM you and we can talk. :)

[madmoisellestar.livejournal.com]

“A feminazi is a woman to whom the most important thing in life is seeing to it that as many abortions as possible are performed. Their unspoken reasoning is quite simple. Abortion is the single greatest avenue for militant women to exercise their quest for power and advance their belief that men aren’t necessary. Nothing matter but me, says the feminazi; the is an unviable tissue mass. Feminazis have adopted abortion as a kind of sacrament for their religion/politics of alienation and bitterness.”

There you go, ‘Feminazi’ as defined by the man who coined the term: Rush Limbaugh.
Like it or not, if you use the term, you invoke those connotations and invite people to assume you’re aligned with Rush on women’s issues.

Problems with extreme feminism (and I’ve got lots) are the same as problems with any other extremists. And, like Christians aren’t all Jerry Fallwell, feminists aren’t all. . . well, come up with your own analogy for that one.



Also: My dad uses “I’m a feminist, myself...” as a pick-up line. And it’s ridiculously successful, so who says feminism doesn't work for men? :p

[evergleam83.livejournal.com]

Um, yes. Yes, and yes.

I, too, have problems with extreme feminism, and extreme versions of most things. But Christians who don't agree with the Jerry Fallwell's of the world don't declare themselves to be anti-Christian, and so I think there's no reason for women to do so.

And hee. Your dad's cute. :)